Didn't See that Coming ... Keep Reading!

 

                                            I hope that someday when I am gone that someone, somewhere
                   picks my soul up, reads these pages and thinks "I wood have loved her."

     It seems kind of crazy to, in times like these "love" something but today, I find that I do.
It is my day off. My mind races to Starbucks with their Salted Caramel Cold foam a top - Chai Tea.
I have become addicted. Lately. It seems that I can taste the ice cold creamy-ness in most of my dreams.
     
Do I want to venture out to get one. I weigh the pros and the cons of the trip.
     Pros: The building is within walking distance.
            The taste of the tea.
            It is 1/2 price drinks until 6pm tonight.
            It is the kick off to the weekend and I don't have work till Monday.
            I bought a car for just these moments.
            I am always thirsty for delicious "sugar" in a cup.
            Today was payday.
     
     Cons:  Ya. There really aren't any.

I will probably end up going a little later but for now? I am in my element. 
     Today is one of my very favorite kind of days. The sky is full of dense gray clouds over taking any slice of blue that might be trying to break through. My window open ushering in the bite of cold air making me long for Autumn. In the close distance, I can smell a fire. Closing my eyes, I am transported back home. Home. Where my heart has always been. Where my heart will always stay.

     
     I imagine things around me wondering how they would be if they were different. Taking a deep breath in - I realize that I am content. Quite awhile ago, I was listening to a <medium> speak. She was talking about how we choose our life before we ever get to live it. I often wonder if that is true? Questioning things that maybe I shouldn't be. I often wonder if that is true? Making myself believe it so that I know I can get through any (thing) that I need too. Knowing that the moment at hand is one that I wanted/wished for, for whatever reason at the time.

     Have you ever thought about ones who are no longer with us? 
When someone asks me if I believe in Ghosts? - I say that I believe in Spirits.

     One of my Grandsons has mentioned things from another World that he was apart of. (We don't pry) Not knowing if it will upset him or just if the fact that we are afraid to find things out that we have no knowledge of much less control over. It is kind of frightening when you search inside your soul for answers.

     The boy speaks of how he left this Earth. How he lost his family and how he chose the one he has now with us. 
     I flash back to another time when my little cousin was hanging out with my friend and myself. He was about 5 years old then. He asked us if we remembered when he was a little kid living on Sawyer street and riding his bike all over town. The child never lived on a street named Sawyer and certainly never had a bike that he would ride around town.
     For myself, I never found it strange much as I grew up with my Grandmother's guidance and in a less then (right) word, she was a "witch." Oh sure! Not the wicked kind but the good kind. There were just (strange) stories she would tell me. Things about the farm road and her daddy. 
     My Grandmother's sister also had stories to share - with music boxes and songs from long ago. 
   
     When I think about it, it was always all around me. Another Aunt would smell a certain flower and could tell of a loved ones passing. Another Grandmother, (adopted) had a very strong connection with her daughter after she lost her that had her go to deep lengths to see the sun never set on her or at least that she was facing it when it did.

     I don't know? Maybe all people have the ability to reach out. To dance with the unknown. Or ... maybe it is just the ones who believe. I might wonder about it a little more then most sometimes but that is okay. I am okay. I am content sitting here at my desk, listening to the cars roll by while wrapped in my sweater trying to keep the chill from touching my bones, waiting on the much sought after rain to fall all the while still thinking about that Starbucks and if I should go or not?

     Some of the family is back now. Silence has been shattered. I do feel as though I need this coffee break now more then ever. So, I shall end this here, grab my keys and wish you all ... Happy sipping's no matter which (coffee) drink you prefer. 

                                                            Enjoy your weekend!
                                                                            Kazz 💋